Thursday, April 16, 2009

Quick Hello...

Good Morning. Let's be honest about this title...are my posts ever quick?

Beau is out dropping off our laundry with our laundry fairy (thanks Elizabeth!) so I thought I'd post a little update. I guess I don't have too much to say but I don't have too much to do either so just humor me.

Big news here today. Beau tell me that they are painting the walls in the hallway. I expect to see the small section I can see painted in the next two days. That will be exciting. The paint color is Grape Mist. I haven't seen it yet but its got to be better than Institution Gray. I've asked my nurses if I can get an accent wall. I'm not holding my breath.

So far its been a good day. My monitoring went well. Gaines looks great and it didn't show any contractions. Still no signs of infection either. I have to confess that little contraction bit made me a little nervous last night. Any time the doctors are relying on me to tell them if my body's doing something weird I get a little panicky. I just start to be ultra sensitive about any little thing I feel and I obsess over trying to figure out if its something I should report, or if its just a regular part of pregnancy. I'm also very wary of telling them that somethings going on. I have a fear that it's really nothing but now that I've told them, they'll rush me off and take my baby before they really had to. Maybe all that makes sense. That's why I have several times asked for prayers that I'll know when something is wrong.

One thing I forgot to mention yesterday is that I will be able to briefly see Gaines after he's born (as long as there are no major issues). I was afraid they'd just take him off without me even getting a glimpse of him. Hopefully all will go smoothly and I'll at least get a look at him.

Also, several people asked me after one of my recent posts what the five questions are that they always ask me. Basically it goes like this:
Any bleeding?
Any cramping?
Any contractions?
Still leaking fluid?
Baby moving ok?
I keep telling them. If any of these things are happening, they will know before they can come in here and ask me each morning.

On the NICU post I did last night. I tried to just give a brief summary of everything we learned. It was in no way comprehensive...that was a lot of info to take in and I am not a doctor or nurse. I do feel like this hospital is very cutting edge in the way they do things so some of it could be very different than what other people have experienced. We choose to trust our doctors here but will not hesitate to question something that we are uncomfortable with. Anyone that knows me knows that.

One last thing. Beau and I are handling this situation the best way we know how and in a manner that we think is best for us. Please bear with us and support us unconditionally. Even people who have been through this before all have different experiences. There may be times when we use this blog to vent, air frustrations and articulate our fears. I never want to sound like I'm complaining about our experience because God has truly blessed us over the last 4 weeks, but there are times that this is very hard and life's petty frustrations are still there. We aren't perfect and there are certainly times when we aren't strong. During these times we still need your support, prayers and positive feedback.

Oh...I had a shower today and was able to dry off with a fluffy yellow towel! It was so nice. Thank you Until Journey's End!

I hope you all have a great day. Please keep praying for us. God is working a miracle in our lives because of your prayers. Only 12 more days until I hit 30 weeks!

Love to all,

Brittany

19 comments:

April - Team Tottle said...

I read some of this book while on bedrest and the rest while Autumn was in the NICU. It was very informative and pretty much covers everything you've written about with your conversation with the NICU Dr. and then some. I have been hanging on to it to pass on to someone who needs it. If you don't already have this book, please let me know, I would like to mail it to you at the hospital.

http://www.amazon.com/Premature-Baby-Book-Everything-Parenting/dp/0316738220/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1239898766&sr=1-1

Devon said...

i think you are doing a GREAT job! you can't really know what its like to lay in a hospital bed day after day and just wait and wonder...it's an incredibly hard place to be.

but your little one is doing awesome and you are doing awesome! the risks are so low now...congrats!!!

The Ellis Family said...

Brittany - Very well written and very eloquently said! You are dealing with the situation like a champ and for anyone to think otherwise, they just don't know you! Glad to hear that you will soon be privy to a new wall color (at least in the hall way). We love you and are praying daily for all of you.

Kelly

Amanda said...

I think blogging is very healthy and a great way to journal and get your feelings out. And especially if you are like me and have a high word quota for the day :) One of the hardest parts after our baby was born was my hubby and I were spending all day every day with pretty much just the two of us with no work distractions. I talked his ear off! Blogging gave me an outlet to work through my thoughts and get some words in for the day and gave my hubby a break, if that makes sense. I don't think anyone expects you to be rosy and happy all the time, or at least they shouldn't. Yes you are very blessed and you realize that, but that doesn't mean that you aren't going through a very rough time. Everyone is entitled a little down time to be a little disapointed at times that things are different than they wanted, expected, wished they could be etc. Also, a lot of preemie parents go through something like intangible grief (or something like that). Basically they are grieving the loss of the normal pregnancy/birth/infant experience but feel extremely guilty as they know they should be feeling very blessed and overjoyed that their baby is alive. Don't feel bad for going through the whole spectrum of emotions now as well as over the next year or two.

You two are such a testimate of God's blessings and your faith to all the blog readers and medical staff at the hospital.

Praise God for 28 weeks and counting, that sweets are still allowed to be enjoyed, no infections, Laundry Fairies and fluffy towels!

Still praying!

King J's Queen said...

I have a suggestion for your wall...but the hospital may not like it. Next time Reed comes, give him a brand new box of WASHABLE markers. Have him draw you a big picture on the wall in your room. His scribbles will remain far more beautiful than any paint job the hospital could provide. Then, before you leave, take a "magic eraser" and wipe off all the marker. Well, I guess Beau would have to take care of that side of it. If they are getting ready to paint anyway, they just might let you. It's worth asking. If not, I bet you could have someone tape butcher paper to the wall for him to draw on for you.

Hang in there! You are doing great and I, personally, think you have a wonderful outlook and attitude given everything that has happened. Try not to let anybody get you down...and use that delete key liberally when you need to!

You know, I'm starting to feel like a member of "The Daniel Family Cheerleaders". Maybe at some point, when you are trying to figure a way to pass the time, you could design your cheerleaders a uniform, colors and give us a mascot.

Have a blessed day!

Stephanie said...

Bet you didn't realize how much you enjoyed good towels until you got stuck in the hospital for awhile :) Hope everything continues going the way it is currently and that little one stays put for a while longer!

jb said...

You are doing an awesome job Brittany!!! You are a wonderful mommy!!! Hang in there!

Sara said...

Brittany,
I can honestly say that most of us go through pregnancy thinking it's just a normal every-day thing. Too soon we forget, that God is in control of this precious miracle that He gave us! I know with my second, I was so busy keeping up with my first, I hardly had time to think about being pregnant. God has given you and Beau a gift of being able to appreciate and savor each day of the miracle of Gaines! What a blessing! You have an amazing outlook on your situation. I am sure that sitting in that bed each day creates its own challenges and fears. Hang in there and continue to put your faith and trust in God. Look at how far you've come!! We pray for you, Beau, Reed and Gaines daily and hope that this next week remains quiet and unventful, but filled with the reminders of God's love and promises. Thinking of you all,
Sara Blakeney

Thomas and Jamie said...

Brittany,

I've been checking your blog 2 or 3 times a day for a while now and I'm praying very hard for you here in Canyon, TX! I know that God has big plans for little Gaines and just know that we KNOW you're thankful! But that doesn't make you superhuman! Complain away - we're listening and it won't change our opinion of you AT ALL!!!

Hokie Grandma said...

You are doing great. We continue to Praise God. We used to live in Northern Virginia and know that GW is a great hospital to be in. You are in the best hands.

April said...

You both have wonderful attitudes!!! It is ok to be down, but you also know that God's hand is in all of this!

Just think, if this had not happened, Reed and Beau would not have been able to go to the Easter Egg Roll!! How many people can say that!?!

Take care and your are in our thoughts and prayers!!

Danny and April Hadden

Amy said...

Still reading every update, still praying.
Your journey is fascinating to me... having spent so much time in a hospital with my now 2 yr old as the patient, most of your experiences and descriptions of 'hospital life' seem so familiar... and yet you are experiencing it from the 'other side'... as the patient. I hope that makes sense.
Anyway...
Thanks for your frequent posts - it is great to know how best to pray and praise! :)

thegrowingcunninghams said...

I'm not sure how I stumbled across your blog, but I'm thrilled that I did. My babies, triplets, were born at 30 weeks gestation and actually endured many of the issues as discussed with your NICU doctor - brain bleeds, CPAP, blood transfusions, PICC lines, heart defects, apneas, bradycardias, etc. I'm pleased to tell you that one week shy of one year old, my three preemies have not shown any signs of developmental delays; in fact, they are right on schedule, if not ahead of the game in many areas. You are in a FABULOUS hospital (we're in the DC area, receiving the best care available. Please feel free to read more about our journey at www.thegrowingcunninghams.com or email me with any NICU questions at therowingcunninghams@yahoo.com. It was long and definitely scary, but it's made us who we are and while we wish our babies didn't have to work so hard their first weeks of life, it made them who they are - strong, faithful, fighters. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and yuor family.

-Debbie

Cary said...

Brittany, I am so glad that you and Gaines continue to do well. Thanks so much to you and Beau for keeping us all updated. I continue to pray for the well being of the entire Daniel Family.


Cary in Alabama

Corrie said...

I am so sad to hear that anyone would be saying anything negative to you. How dare they!!! You are doing a wonderful job. Everyone's experience is different no matter what they have gone through and to criticize or give you suggestions is wrong. You are entitled to have days that you are scared and frightened. Even with God by your side the unknown is frightening. Your blog should be a place for you to vent. My blog has and will continue to be a place for me to write my feelings and emotions. My first blog entry that I ever wrote turned out to be the most theraputic thing I have ever written. I felt that writing that helped put closer to what I had gone through. No one will ever know what going through this experience in another state without your loved ones will ever feel like. I admire you. If it was me I do not know if I could handle this. I pray every day I check your blog that Gaines is still baking away. If you have any questions or just feel the need to vent about life on bed rest or life in the NICU please feel free to let me know. www.macmurphys.blogspot.com

Sarah said...

Still praying for 34(!) weeks from across the street, and enjoying reading your frequent updates.

I'm glad you had a fruitful conversation with the NICU doc. She's great, she was actually the one who take care of our little guy the night he was born.

I'm happy you got a fluffy towel and have a laundry fairy to help out. :) Please tell me if the air is still crazy-dry in your room -- I can bring over a humidifier and some incredible Aveeno cream that helps a lot in the winters here.

leslep said...

So glad to hear that you and Gaines are still together. Let me know if I can get anything for you from A town!! You are in our thoughts and prayers daily!!

amangoprincess said...

I was hoping you could answer some questions.
First of all, if your water broke 4 weeks ago, how is the baby able to continue to grow inside you? Is there any fluid left or has it sealed the leak and made more?

Why wouldn't they allow you to go until the baby is ready to come if you are able to hang on longer?

Thanks in advance for answering these questions. I am going through a similar situation and scared.
Thanks and god bless.

Christie said...

I can't imagine being in your shoes and how difficult it must be. I agree that even people who have walked in your shoes can sympthasize (sp?) with you, but each case is individually different. I am so pleased that everything is going well for you. God is in control of the situation. May God continue to work through the Dr's.