Sunday, April 26, 2009

Bittersweet Day

Just a quick one for now. We called the NICU and Gaines is stable. We are getting ready to go down and see him soon. I need eat breakfast first because I'm still not up to full strength. So after breakfast arrives and a quick shower we'll head down for a hopefully a detailed report. One good thing is that at our 6:00 visit last night, I summarized the doctors report with so, he's still stable...and he said, I think he's doing better. So awesome to hear but now I am bracing myself for a letdown. Please remember, he's still considered critical and has a LOT of help breathing so he still needs tons of prayers...especially for those little lungs. Hopefully I'll have a better report soon.

Oh, I got to change his diaper yesterday afternoon. My mom and I went in and the nurse was just about to do it so she let me. I was so nervous! I guess I did an ok job. I mean first of all he's tiny and so fragile right now but I also had to do it through the isolet arm holes so that made it tough too. At any rate, it felt awesome to be able to do something "normal" for my child.

Today is a bittersweet day. After 39 days here, I'm getting out. I'm so excited to breathe fresh air and feel the sun on my face but I HATE the thought of being away from Gaines. Please pray for our comfort as we walk away from this hospital and our tiny baby.

Love to all,

Brittany

13 comments:

Beth said...

Praying for a good day.

Aunt Beth

Lori said...

Thats happy news, but sad to leave Gaines behind. I am sure you won't be far from the hospital so you can make frequent visits and a lot of them through out the days.

stevens clan said...

Hello, Brittany. I know we don't know each other but I've been following your blog since you were admitted to the hospital. I just had to comment on this post after reading about you changing Gaines' diaper through the isolette holes. Been there, done that! My John wasn't born as critical as Gaines (he was 32 weeks and, believe it or not, weighed 6 pounds!) but I remember those NICU days, especially trying to do things through holes. I will be thinking of you today as you leave....I know how difficult that will be, having done it twice, with John and with my 8-week old Lydia who had to stay in the hospital because of jaundice. Oh how wonderful that we have the Lord to see us through! Cling to your husband -- you'll need him -- but more importantly than anything, find your strength in your's & Gaines' Heavenly Father. He will never leave you nor forsake you!

Thinking of you in Ohio,
Karen

Sassy said...

Oh boy do I know how you feel. The day I was discharged was very bittersweet. On one hand I couldn't wait to get out of the hospital, but it was also so heartwrenching knowing my baby had such a long road ahead of her. I was in the hopital for three weeks and she was there for 11. She is my little hero. Just remember that preemies may look tiny and fragile, but they are fighters! I think you will also find once you get him home that he'll have the same spunk that got him through the NICU. I have spoken to many preemie parents who have noticed the same thing. :)

Kate said...

I know it is so hard to leave the hospital without your baby. I will be praying for you.

Heather said...

Enjoy the fresh air and just remember you can visit your baby whenever you want to. You need to look after yourself as well. Take care. once he is stable will they be able to move him to a NCIU closer to your home.

leslep said...

So glad to hear that you were able to change Gaines diaper yesterday. I am praying that you will all be leaving the hospital together very soon. Is your Mom still in DC?

Tonia said...

Praying for a good report and a great day of healing!!

Tonia

A Growing Family said...

It is so hard to leave the hosptial without your baby... something you never imagined you would do. God's grace will abound for you and your family during your NICU rollercoaster and it will make the day you leave WITH Gaines even more special!!!

Rhonda said...

Brittany & Beau,

I just got back to Alabama and caught back up with your blog. Congratulations on the birth of Gaines! The pictures of him are adoreable. I am glad you were able to change his diaper yesterday and Gaines was able to feel the tender loving touch of his mother. I am praying specifically for his lung development, peace for you and Beau during this roller coaster ride, wisdom for the doctor's as they decide on his course of treatment and strength for you guys as you leave the hospital today.

Rhonda

Erica said...

I will pray for you today as you leave the hospital without Gaines. I remember so vividly how heartbreaking that experience is, especially the first day. But just try to focus on how AMAZING it will feel to finally take him HOME with you. Prayers!

Daxton's Personal Assistant said...

What a hard day... Praying for yours and Gaines' strength today. I remember thinking that my son would think I had abandoned him, and would somehow always remember me not being there every second, but, as earlier posters said, these babies are tough... Much tougher than we are... A year later we have a very happy little boy, with lots of scars to brag to his friends about when he gets older, but a smile plastered on his face most of the time, and an iron will and zest for life that make me love him more than I ever thought possible...

Long story short, you'll always remember how hard these days are, even though the memories fade with time (and Xanax :) but Gaines will just love and learn and grow, like babies do, and will be none the wiser. He'll amaze you daily with his fortitude, and instead of you giving him strength, you'll get it from him instead.

Praying for you in TN...

Ruthie said...

I'm sure that'll be so hard to leave the hospital without Gaines, so I'll be praying for peace for you and Beau about that. I'm so glad you got to change his diaper! That must have just been wonderful, even if tricky. :) Praying today is more sweet than bitter.

Ruthie, in Ohio