Sunday, June 27, 2010

Beads, Crazy Hats & Sunglasses

This past week I spent a couple of days in New Orleans on business. Bless my wife, she kept both boys by herself. When I came home on Saturday Reed immediately asked for the "prizes" I promised to bring him. Reed loved his hat and beads while Gaines loved the sunglasses.

Thursday, June 24, 2010

My Boys

My little Gaines has been quite the handful lately. This child is into everything all the time and no matter where you are going or what you are doing, he’s right behind you. I tried to paint my toenails last night and got about half a toe painted and guess who showed up? Turn on the hair dryer and 3 seconds later you’ll see a little head pop around the corner with a big ole smile on his face. Don’t even think about loading or unloading the dishwasher. If he hears water running or dishes clanging, Gaines will be there. I seriously have to be very careful not to let the plates or silverware hit each other if I’m trying to put something in the dishwasher. That, and I do it very fast because I know if I stand still too long he’ll catch up to me. If he’s around, I’ll only open the dishwasher a crack and shove whatever it is in there. Kristen told me yesterday that she went to rinse off a dish to put it in the dishwasher and by the time she turned around, he was standing on the open door holding on to the top shelf.

Gaines loves to be held and feels like he’s entitled to be held 100% of the day. If he’s not being held he’s either begging to be held or asleep…and honestly, he takes the best naps when he’s being held. Lately, we’ve been trying to not just immediately pick him up when he wants…at some point he does need to learn that the world does not completely revolve around him, but that usually doesn’t go very well. He’s taken to gagging himself if he doesn’t get his way. I think it’s because when his reflux was so bad, anytime he’d gag we’d immediately quit what we were doing to attend to him. He knows what he’s doing. We’ve been working on understanding the word “no” and that screaming at the top of your lungs (no tears, just screaming) to get someone to pick you up is not acceptable. Usually it’s just an Ahhhh! scream but sometimes you get a high pitched girly scream. It’s lovely.

The good news is that he still gives his good hugs and is the best snuggler. He loves to put his forehead to yours and smile. It pretty much melts my heart. He’s also gotten a lot more fun with his inquisitiveness and since I can remember Reed being this way, I’m a little relieved that he’s doing “normal” things. Plus, Reed was a big fan of putting things in/playing in the toilet and thus far Gaines hasn’t seemed that interested in the toilet (other than flushing) so I guess I have that to be thankful for…or look forward to since I probably just jinxed myself.

Reed is still pretty well on a good streak. Deep down he loves Gaines but he’s not really a big fan of the way Gaines plays right now. Reed is a rough little boy but he doesn’t appreciate Gaines’ roughness when he’s trying to watch cartoons or something. Plus Gaines is a bit (understatement of the year) of a hair puller and I feel Reed’s pain on that one. I can barely be around Gaines without my hair in a pony tail.

Yesterday Reed was in the bathtub and Gaines was at his perch tub-side watching. I was in the kitchen (where I can see both of them) and I heard Reed telling Gaines “No, Gaines…that’s not the right thing! That’s not the right thing!” I went to check on the situation and Reed was upset with him for knocking his one of his “boys” (three plastic fish) from the side of the tub into the water. You know, a major devastation. However, there have been a lot of nights when Reed will entice Gaines over to the tub…Really sweetly he’ll say ”Come here Gaineser…” and when Gaines gets there, Reed makes a big splash and gets Gaines all wet. Which of course Gaines thinks is hilarious and encourages Reed all the more.

My sweet Reed has also started either repeating his prayers after me or saying them on his own and hearing his sweet little voice say his prayers is precious. And if he feels led to thank God for his Spiderman stickers some nights, it just makes me smile all the more.

That’s the update for now.

Love to all,


Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Gaines Fish

Tonight I was giving Gaines a bath and Reed was "helping" me. He was holding Gaines' oxygen line and told me he was Gaines oxygen cord was the fishing line. All of a sudden he looked and me all wide-eyed and said, "I got somethin'...Its a Gaines-fish! I caught a Gaines-fish mama!"

I just thought it was cute and clever.

Love to all,


Sunday, June 20, 2010

Gaines Eats

So, guess what. Gaines eats now. We've only been stressing about this for how long now? All of a sudden, he acts like he's been eating his whole life.

Earlier this week we decided to cut back from four 195 cc bottles to three 240 cc bottles (and yes, we still measure his bottles in ccs...a nod to the NICU days) and have tried to make up the missing calories with real food. The nutritionist/pulmonologist want him having so many calories a day and since his pediaure is the best way to get them (just a lot of calories in them) they've been pushing those but they keep him from wanting to eat real food which the pediatrician/therapists/myself think he needs to be eating. Basically we kept him so full of pediasure that he never got hungry. So far, I think he's making up more than enough calories with this new plan and it has made life so much more enjoyable.

Now, I do feel like I'm setting him up to have terrible eating habits later in life because we feed him all this junk food (higher calories than the healthy stuff) but whatever it takes to fatten him up. Cheese puffs are the current favorite...and side note, I forgot how delicious they are. He also eats these pound cake muffins that I found, macaroni and cheese, chicken nuggets, crackers with butter, carrots cooked in butter and sugar, cookies, brownies, french fries, peaches (that's healthy), etc. If any of you have any ideas of foods that are high calorie and easy for a 1 year old to eat, please, send them my way. I think peanut butter would be good...I just don't know that he's ready for that yet.

The hard part is feeding Gaines the high calorie stuff and not feeding it to Reed. Or trying to cook fattening things for Gaines that won't fatten up the rest of us. He doesn't eat huge quantities so it doesn't make since to make a whole chicken and rice casserole for just him...which means we will all be eating chicken and rice casserole tomorrow night...and I will be going on a run...and I guess the Gaines will get all the leftovers...for the rest of the week. I've just been trying to cook a little lighter now that its summer.

I'm sorry this post is so random. I'm just typing.

This morning Reed gave Beau a card that he made him at school. In the card was a picture of Reed wearing a maroon t-shirt and a cowboy hat. I asked the teacher what that was about and she said they let all the kids choose from the play clothes in the "home-living" center and told them to choose something their dad would wear...or something like that. Now...I've known Beau a good 7 years now and I have NEVER seen him even think about wearing a cowboy hat but apparently, that's how Reed pictures him. Beau looked at me this morning and said, "What does he think I do?" It was all pretty funny. I love Beau but he's not exactly the rugged cowboy type. Later in the morning Beau asked Reed what daddy's job was and Reed thought for a minute and said, "Cutting the grass". I'm trying to teach him to say that daddy is a businessman. I think that's hilarious for some reason.

All in all we've had a good day and a good week. Gaines eating makes life so much easier. Less bottle fighting and less stressing because he won't eat "real" food. Next step...sippy cup.

That's all I've got for now.

Love to all,


Monday, June 14, 2010

Still Alive

Ok…I know that I’ve been a total slacker on the blog as of late but I have very good reasons for that. 1. I was out of town for a week. I tried to update at night from my hotel but my work computer wouldn’t allow it for some reason. 2. Once I got back I had trouble getting on the Internet the two times I tried. 3. I finally got the Internet working and typed a long blog only to lose it when I tried to post it. 4. After that devastation I just gave up for about a week. I’m re-inspired today though. I have lots to report. This might be long.

First, we tried Gaines on only half of the diuretics he was used to but that didn’t last long. He started breathing harder and quit eating because it was hard for him to do both at once. We took him to our pediatrician and he felt like the diuretics were the problem. He’s back on them now and is breathing much easier and eating better…he never eats great but definitely back to normal. I was pretty devastated over that whole business…to say the least. Beau took Gaines to the doctor that morning as I drove to my out-of-town work thing. When he called to confirm that the diuretics were the culprit (as we were expecting) I pretty much lost it. I was/am SO ready to put this whole oxygen thing behind us. That day I’d just had all that I could stand and cried my little eyes out as I drove. As I cried I begged God to just make him better. Told Him I’d learned all that I needed to learn, that my patience had been tested enough, that I’d been positive for long enough, that I was ready to be done with all of this.

Somewhere along the way I dried it up and came out with a better attitude. I realized that once things get to going better, I start thinking that I’m in control and that I’m handling my life. This little episode was on a much smaller scale than the whole DC experience but I realized it was God breaking me…again. It was his way of reminding me that He is in control and that I can either do this the easy way and let him handle it while I just keep the faith and get out of the way, or I could cry and kick and scream and complain about doctors appointments, and not eating and weight gain and dragging around oxygen tanks and every thing else that comes with it. I decided to make the smart choice and quit worrying and trying to “fix” Gaines myself. Sometimes I get so focused on the destination that I forget I’m worrying my life away. As cheesy as it sounds, I always blare that Miley Cyrus song whenever it comes on…something about mountains…The Climb maybe? I don’t have it on cd or anything (do people still buy cds?) but I definitely sing my little heart out when it comes on the radio.

So…Gaines is back on diuretics and we are focusing on weight gain. I will not bore you with all the details of that but basically our pediatrician/therapists and pulmonologist/nutritionist are on opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to what they think we should be doing. Awesome. Have I told y’all my thoughts on doctors lately? I appreciate all of them individually…I really do but this business about not being on the same page…annoying. I tell my mom all the time, if any of them knew the right thing to tell us…they’d all be telling us the same thing. So, my solution is to take both sets of advice (and lets be honest…that’s all it really is isn’t it?) and coming up with my (our) own plan. It changes daily…pretty much based on Gaines’ moods…and the moods that I’m in based on his cooperation level. That child is lucky he’s so cute and sweet (90% of the time) and gives good hugs. He’s a lot of work…good thing I love him.

Let’s see…what else? Beau and I celebrated our 6th anniversary. It was nice. I’m pretty lucky to have him. I could not have made it through this past year without him. It’s been a hard year. Not just on each of us individually but together. He might not like me admitting that on here but its true and I’m trying to be honest. When we were in DC, it was he and I against the world…you know-we were together and focused pretty much on one thing…Gaines. Now that we’ve been back, we have life to contend with and haven’t had a ton of time for each other. We are getting better at that. I’m thankful for a sister who baby-sits and for life getting a little easier and allowing for time to just sit on the couch and watch TV together. I’m also trying to make that more of a priority than my daily to do list.

My birthday was this past weekend. Beau has been trying to make fun of me for being old but it really doesn’t bother me. I made up my mind a while back…probably when I turned 22 and in my mind, “adult”…that I wasn’t going to be worried about how old I was. I am 29 years old and have the life I’ve always wanted. A wonderful husband, two beautiful boys, a great dog, a house I love when I’m not pouring money into it, a job that I actually enjoy, a church that I love, good friends, good health (insurance!), a great extended family…and I could go on and on but you get the picture.

Reed has been pretty sweet as of late. Not sure what’s gotten into him but he’s just so lovable right now. Kidding…he’s always lovable but he’s on a good streak right now. Of course he tests us from time to time but no major issues. He told me the other night that he loved me “on purpose”. Not really sure what he meant by that but I’ll take it. Also, I tried on a dress for Beau last night that I’d just bought to see what he thought about it. Beau was kind of iffy on it but Reed said, “I love that dress, mama”. I just looked at Beau and smiled a smirky smile. Also last night I brought home McDonalds for dinner (which we do not do on a regular basis but we’d been out of town for the weekend and had not been to the grocery store), as I was getting it all set out Reed was saying “I can’t wait!” over and over. I think it was the Sprite. He loves a good Sprite.

The other day, Gaines knocked something over and it made a big crash sound. Reed looked and me and said, “Get him a big, giant spanking”.

One other thing about Reed. He said something about a sister the other day and I told him that he didn’t have a sister but that I did. That Abby was my sister. Reed thought for a second and said, “My sister is Pop (my dad)”.

Also, from time to time, Reed will do sweet things and I’ll tell him that it makes my heart happy. The other day he went to the bathroom came out with no underwear on. I asked where it was and he told me he didn’t need to wear his underwear. I asked him why not and he said, “Because it makes my heart happy”. He was instructed to wear it anyway.

Love to all,